


if it's a dream, don't wake me

by manbun_zukka



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Amabassador Sokka, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, F/M, Fertility Issues, Firelord Zuko, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Kinda, M/M, Pregnant Zuko (Avatar), Semi-graphic childbirth, So does Toph, Sokka gives him the hug, Toph Beifong and Zuko are Siblings, Trans Zuko (Avatar), Zuko (Avatar) Needs a Hug, iroh been knew, izumi is an angel, married sokka and zuko, oh yeah, there's nothing described other than pain but its still there, theres jinzula because i said so, theres no misscarriges
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:07:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27727888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/manbun_zukka/pseuds/manbun_zukka
Summary: “It’s okay to be afraid,” he said softly. “We’ll be okay.”Zuko nodded slightly, and looked up at Sokka, his amber eyes shining. “We should start trying.” He took a deep breath. “For a baby, I mean.”Sokka’s eyes widened, but he nodded at Zuko nonetheless, squeezing his hand. “Okay. But only if you want to. You shouldn’t have to feel pressured into anything just because the council says you have to do it. We can always look into some of the Northern medicine stuff.”Zuko was insistent though. “No. It’s okay. I’ve been thinking about it for a while, you know that. I’ll be okay. I think so, at least.”“Okay,” Sokka whispered, leaning across the table to press a gentle kiss onto Zuko’s scar. “Okay.”---It was never going to be easy, for Sokka and Zuko. To be married, to have children. But they knew that they'd get through it. Because they had each other.
Relationships: Aang/Katara (Avatar), Azula/Jin (Avatar), Bato/Hakoda (Avatar), Iroh & Zuko (Avatar), Jeong Jeong/Piandao (Avatar), Mai & Zuko (Avatar), Mai/Ty Lee (Avatar), Sokka & Suki (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar), Toph Beifong & Zuko, the gaang - Relationship
Comments: 32
Kudos: 293





	if it's a dream, don't wake me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [xhangemhighx](https://archiveofourown.org/users/xhangemhighx/gifts).



> Hey yall! I've been wanting to write something like this for a while, and I finally got around to it! Just to clairify, the 'fertility issues' tag refers to having trouble getting pregnant, not misscarriage. If that's triggering for you, then please, don't read this. Also, there is a scene with childbirth, but it's not graphic, and the most descriptive it gets is describing the pain. Again, if you don't like that, please don't read it. 
> 
> For those of you wondering, I just changed my username! It used to be @cj_thedepressedgay, but now it's @manbun_zukka! (Also, for those of you wondering, catch me the wind should have a new chapter up some time next week! I took a break from that to work on this, but it should be up soon!)
> 
> That's all for now! I hope you enjoy!  
> xx,  
> CJ

The council first brought up heirs three months after Zuko took the throne. He had just turned eighteen, and he was still trying to weed the Ozai supporters out of his cabinet, when the high council sprung the topic of marriage and children onto him.

“Lord Zuko,” Shira started. She was a young woman, an Ambassador from the Eastern Earth Kingdom, and Zuko had brought her into his cabinet not even a month into his rule.“ We in the council have been wondering about your contingency plan, in the case of heirs.”

Zuko sucked in a breath, in through his nose, out through his mouth. He knew that someone would bring up the topic of marriage and heirs at some point, and hadn’t been looking forward to the resulting conversation. “Ambassador Shira, as much as I appreciate the concern of the council, this situation has already been taken care of. In the case that I were to die before I could have any children, General Iroh would take the throne, and the children of Lady Mai, one of my dearest friends, would be the heirs of the Fire Nation. If I were to die with children who were too young to rule, then my spouse would continue to rule the Fire Nation until they came of age. All contingency plans are taken care of, and you have no need to worry.”

Ambassador Shira blew out a relieved breath, and bowed shallowly to Zuko. She was a good one, Zuko thought. “Thank you for your reassurance, Lord Zuko,” she said. 

“You’re very welcome, Ambassador Shira,” Zuko murmured. “Now, on the topic of Ambassadors, our new delegation from the South Pole will be arriving within the next week…”

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


The council didn’t bring the topic of heirs up again until two years later, when Zuko was only a few months past his twentieth birthday.

“Lord Zuko,” General Zi said, “if you wouldn’t mind, the council would like to speak to you about marriage and heirs. You have been in power for more than three years now, and we think that it’s time for you to consider taking a wife. You have mentioned before that you are well acquainted with Lady Mai, and we can see her being a good match for you.”

Just as he had years ago, Zuko breathed in through his nose and out through his mouth. Twice, this time. To his left, Sokka grabbed his hand under the table. “General Zi,” Zuko sighed. “I will not be partaking in an arranged marriage. Yes, Lady Mai and I are good friends, however she is in a relationship with Commander Ty Lee of the Kyoshi Warriors, and will not break off that relationship for anything.”

“My Lord,” the General replied, “surely you must know that by the time your father was your age-”

The candles along the walls flared as Zuko stood up, glaring at Zi with a fiery stare. “ _ Do not _ ,” he spit, “bring my father into this. General you should very well know that my mother was sold into that marriage, and I refuse to put another person into that position. I plan to marry someone whom I love and care for, and not marry someone for power. The implication that I would do such a thing is despicable.”

The General swallowed, and bowed shallowly, muttering a  _ yes my Lord,  _ and sitting down. 

“Thank you, General Zi,” Zuko said. “Now, let us proceed onto the actual topic of this meeting, the recreation of our school curriculum. Ambassador Sokka, I believe you have something prepared….”

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


Later that night, when Sokka crawled into bed, Zuko was already there, laying on his back and looking up at the ceiling. When Zuko had first been crowned, he had the Firelord’s chambers almost completely renovated. Toph took down walls and helped to put in windows, and they redid the floors so that instead of dark, foreboding marble, they were made of a light tan stone that was cool to touch. 

But the ceiling. That was Zuko’s- and Sokka’s, for that matter- favorite part of the renovations. He’d commissioned a muralist from the village where his mother grew up, and had him paint an image of the sun rising over the Fire Nation’s shores. The sunrise was meant to signify a new beginning for the nation, a new start. 

Most nights, Zuko would lay awake and stare up at the mural, his hand outstretched to touch some part of Sokka, to reassure himself that his boyfriend was still there. That night, however, when Sokka lay down next to Zuko, instead of reaching out and grabbing onto a hand, or a shoulder, or a bicep, Zuko rolled over so that he was nearly on top of Sokka, burying his face into Sokka’s shoulder.

“Hey,” Sokka whispered, letting his hands come up to wrap around Zuko’s waist. “Are you okay?” Zuko shook his head into Sokka’s shoulder, burrowing his face down even deeper. Sokka frowned lightly, lifting one hand from Zuko’s waist to start carding it through his hair. “What’s wrong?” he asked. “Talk to me, baby.”

Zuko huffed a bit at the pet name, but didn’t lift his head from Sokka’s shoulder. “It’s just… scary,” he said after a moment. 

“What is?” Sokka asked softly.

“The idea of becoming a father,” Zuko murmured. “I mean, when the council talks about it, they don’t even talk about my future children as- as  _ children.  _ They talk about them as heirs. As the future of the royal family. And I don’t- that’s just what I was, y’know? I was an heir, not a child. Not a son. And I don’t want my kids to grow up that way. I don’t want to be my father and buy a girl into an arranged marriage, and I don’t want to have kids young just because I’m a royal. I just- I’m not  _ ready,  _ Sokka. I don’t know if I’ll  _ ever  _ be ready.”

Sokka blew out a breath and pressed a soft kiss to the crown of Zuko’s head. “You know my dad told me once, about what it was like for him when I was born. My parents were young, our age, I think. My dad’s dad has just died when they found out that my mom was pregnant, and my dad was the most capable warrior in the Tribe, so they were making him Chief. They had only been married for two months. They didn’t want kids yet. They most certainly weren’t ready. But my dad said that when my mom gave birth to me, and when he held me for the first time, he knew that he’d’ve never been ready. And he was okay with that.”

Carefully, Sokka tilted Zuko’s head up so that he could press a soft kiss to his lips. “He told me that they weren’t ready for a second child when Katara was born, and they weren’t ready when she started to bend, and he wasn’t ready when Mom died, and he wasn’t ready to leave us for war. He said that you can never be ready to be a parent. But that’s just the way it is.”

Zuko squeezed his eyes shut and dropped his head down again, this time laying so that his forehead was resting on Sokka’s sternum. “But what if- what if I-”

“No, Zuko,” Sokka insisted. “You’re going to be a great parent. You’re going to be nothing like your father, you hear me? Don’t even think about saying that.”

Zuko sniffled, and Sokka felt a few tears hit his bare chest. He took his hand out of Zuko’s hair and wrapped it back around his waist, holding him tight. 

Once his tears had subsided, Zuko looked back up at Sokka, his lashes still wet. “The Firelord’s children have to be biologically related to them,” he whispered. Sokka's chest tightened, and he swallowed. So  _ that  _ was what Zuko was worrying about.

Zuko’s trans identity wasn’t a secret, per say. It was just not spoken of. When he was a kid, before his banishment, he didn’t feel all that out of place. He thought it was normal not to want to wear dresses or not to like the title of ‘princess,’ and it wasn’t until he was eleven, when his mother left and he became crown princess, heir to the Firelord’s throne, that Ozai made him start dressing up in feminine gowns and robes for formal events, wearing makeup, and looking for potential suitors that would make good husbands, that Zuko started to realise that maybe he wasn’t as normal as he thought he was. 

And it wasn’t until a few weeks into his banishment, when Zuko heard one of the ship’s crew members talking about picking up hormones for his son’s transition in the Earth Kingdom town that they were docking in, when Zuko realised that there were other people like him. Uncle was supportive, of course he was, and when Zuko returned to the palace after Ba Sing Se, Ozai expressed nothing but distaste for his new ‘predicament’ but let him continue on living the way that he was. By the time he was crowned as Firelord, the majority of the nation remembered him as the banished prince, and Zuko took no time to help them remember the feminization of his childhood. 

The majority of the new council members that he brought on weren’t nobles like his father’s council, but instead people of the working class, and Ambassadors from the other nations who wouldn’t have known him as a child, and wouldn’t have known him as a princess because of it. 

But still, when the council brought up the issue of heirs, of the continuation of the royal bloodline, it made Zuko’s stomach knot up. They kept trying to push him towards a respectable, noble wife, one to bear the children that he couldn’t make with a woman. Really, the council should’ve been trying to get him a husband.

But Zuko didn’t need a husband. He had Sokka, and the both of them had come to the consensus early on that they would be a forever sort of thing. It had been three years since then, and they were still going strong, but Zuko was still worried; worried that one day the weight of it all would come crashing down onto Sokka’s shoulders and he would realise that Zuko wasn’t worth it in the long run.

“Hey, baby, I can hear you thinking in there,” Sokka’s warm voice broke through the fog of Zuko’s mind, and he lifted himself onto his forearms so that he was leaning over Sokka instead of resting against his chest. Sokka brought a hand up and brushed away a strand of hair that hung in Zuko’s face, letting his hand linger on Zuko’s temple for a moment before bringing it down to cup his cheek.

“I’m scared, Sokka,” Zuko said, for the second time that night. “I’m so, so scared.”

Sokka hummed lightly, and then manhandled Zuko so that he was laying on his side, Sokka’s body forming an arch around his. “I know,” he whispered. “I am too. But it’s gonna be okay. We’re gonna get through it together.”

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


Two months later, the warriors came to visit from Kyoshi, Mai with them. Sokka and Suki spent most of their waking hours together, catching each other up on what was missed in a two year’s worth of letters. (Even after their breakup following Sozin’s Comet, the two of them remained close friends. Zuko was never jealous of Suki for it, in fact he was  _ glad  _ that they managed to stay close.) Ty Lee was assigned as his personal bodyguard for a few weeks so that Zuko could give his usual guard, Kenji, some time off (Agni bless that man, he most certainly deserved it), and because Mai went everywhere that Ty Lee went those days, she started attending all of Zuko’s meetings, and spending her free time in his office, letting him bounce ideas off of her for hours at a time.

It was two weeks into the visit, when Zuko and Mai were sitting next to each other in a meeting with the council, Ty Lee standing behind Zuko’s chair and to his left, Sokka in a chair that sat perfectly in Zuko’s blind spot, that the topic of marriage was brought up once again.

“My Lord,” Admiral Fong started, looking at Zuko before turning to Mai. “My Lady,” he said sweetly. She narrowed her eyes at the title. “I think, Lord Zuko, now that Lady Mai has returned from Kyoshi Island, preparations for your upcoming nuptials should begin.”

Zuko could see Ty Lee stiffening in his peripheral vision, and Mai audibly growled at the man, making him cower a bit. Beside him, Sokka’s hand slid into his own, and Zuko squeezed it, grateful. He looked to Mai, silently asking her if she wanted him to handle it. Mai shook her head, once.

_ I’ve got this,  _ her face said.

“Admiral,” Mai spit, standing from her chair and pulling a dagger from the inside of her sleeves. Fong eyed it wearily, but stood his ground, standing proudly from his spot at the table. “Surely, Lord Zuko has told you by now that I am engaged.”

The Admiral swallowed, his hands trembling at his sides. “Of course, my Lady. I only assumed-”

“You assumed  _ what,  _ Admiral?” Mai asked cooly, stepping away from her space at the table and beginning to pace slowly through the council room. “That just because I am engaged to a woman, my relationship is worth throwing away? That I’d be willing to sell myself into some political arrangement for the good of the nation?” With a flick of her wrist, Mai sent the dagger across the room, and it sailed straight past the Admiral’s ear, shaving off the bottom of his sideburn as it passed. “Surely, Admiral, you’d know that my fiance is one of the Commanders of the Kyoshi Warriors, a master with both fans and chi blocking. She could find every pressure point in your body and take you out in seconds, and she’s standing right there, Admiral,” Mai said, gesturing fluidly to Ty Lee. The Admiral looked up at the other girl, who narrowed her grey eyes at him and fiddled with one of her fans. 

Fong swallowed again.

“M-my Lady, I mean you no disrespect-”

“You don’t mean me anything, Fong,” Mai growled. “Before this meeting, I was nothing but a pawn in your political game, a helpless girl who would happily take her place at the Firelord’s side. But surely,  _ surely,  _ if the Firelord himself had told you that he was averse to a political marriage, if your leader had given you the exact reasons why he was against such a thing- which I know he has, Admiral, I may not live in the Fire Nation anymore, but Lord Zuko and I keep a close correspondence- surely you wouldn’t disrespect such a simple, mundane, ask, when it was coming from the leader of your nation?”

The Admiral’s throat was dry by that point, and he could no longer swallow away his worries. He turned to Zuko. “M-my Lord, I truly never meant to-”

“Let her speak,” Zuko interrupted him.

“Thank you, Lord Zuko,” Mai said swiftly, taking the conversation back into her hands. “But, Admiral, you couldn’t listen to a very valid point, not even when it came from the Firelord himself. Lord Zuko has made it  _ very  _ clear that he won’t be taking part in an arranged marriage, and neither will I. As the Fire Nation enters into a new era, truth has been a mindset put at the forefront of everyone’s minds. In order to live truthfully, I plan to marry the woman I love, and I know that Lord Zuko will marry the person that he loves as well.”

With that, Mai sat down, as did the general, looking dazed. Zuko looked out at the rest of the council, all of whom were stunned into silence, although some of them (Sokka and Shira) had small, proud smiles on their faces.

“Thank you, Lady Mai,” Zuko said sweetly, standing from his seat and addressing the room. “I think that we should end today’s meeting here.”

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


Later that day, when everyone was sitting in the informal dining room, having what Sokka liked to call Family Dinner (although it was really just him, Zuko, Mai, Ty Lee, and Suki) Ty Lee looked up from her plate suddenly, a broad smile on her face.

“I just remembered what the highlight of my day was!” she exclaimed. (Yes, family dinner included mandatory activities, such as ‘what was the highlight of your day’ activities, and ‘what is one new thing you learned today’ questionnaires.) (Sokka just wanted to give them all the childhood that they never had, okay?)

“Oh?” Suki asked, setting down her chopsticks. 

“Yeah!” she went on. “It was during the council meeting, when Mai tore Admiral Fong a new one! She was  _ so  _ hot!”   
  


“Oh?” Suki said again, this time with glee, as she turned to Mai, who was blushing deeply and looking down at her dumplings with incredible interest. “Why have I not heard about this?”

“It was nothing, really,” Mai insisted, still looking down at her plate. 

“Oh, shut up,” Zuko said, not unkindly. Mai finally looked up to shoot a glare at him, but he was undeterred yet. “C’mon Mai, give yourself some credit. You were awesome in there.”

“Was she really?” Suki asked, leaning her chin onto the palm of her hand and studying Mai intently.

“Yeah,” Sokka put in, “she was pretty incredible. Admiral Fong was all like, ‘Zuko and Mai need an arranged marriage,’ and then Mai stood up and  _ literally  _ tore him to pieces, and she was like, ‘Bitch, sit down, me and my fiance will murder you and hold hands while doing it,’ and then he sat the fuck down.”

Mai swore under her breath at her plate, Ty Lee clapped her hands, and Zuko smiled lightly, leaning into Sokka’s side. “That’s basically how it went,” he said, clarifying to Suki that none of them were exaggerating.

Suki whistled under her breath. “Sounds like one hell of a council meeting,”

“Actually, speaking of that,” Mai said suddenly, “Zuko, are all of the council meetings like that?” Zuko raised an eyebrow at her. “I mean, is the topic of marriage brought up so frequently?” she clarified.

Zuko hummed in the back of his throat. “No, not usually. I think this is maybe, uh, the third time that someone’s brought it up?” he offered, looking to Sokka for confirmation.

“It’s only the second time that anyone’s talked about it while I was there,” Sokka mused, “but you did tell me about the first time right before I became Ambassador, so yeah, I guess this was the third time.”

“Wait, Zuko,” Suki said suddenly, “does the council not know that you two are together?”

Zuko nodded slowly. “Yeah. I mean, it didn’t seem like an incredibly good idea for us to go public right after the war, when everything was changing already, so we kept it to ourselves. And, I dunno, there just never seemed to be a right moment after that.”

“Y’know, if you go public with your relationship then maybe all of the arranged marriage stuff will stop,” Ty Lee said cheerfully, wrapping an arm around Mai’s waist and leaning into her shoulder. “I’m sure that no one will try to get in your way if Sokka threatened them like Mai did!”

Suki’s eyes went wide. “Wait, hold on, who did you  _ threaten!?” _

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


When Zuko was twenty three, and Sokka was twenty two, they both proposed.

Sokka would come to blame Katara for ruining his proposal, and Zuko would blame Aang for ruining his, but in reality it was their joint efforts and faults that the couple ended up proposing at the same time.

It happened in the south. Zuko was there on political business, and Sokka always loved a chance to visit his family, so he went with him. (It was also a good excuse to go down so that he could finish carving his betrothal necklace with Hakoda and Bato’s help, but that’s besides the point.) The night before their departure, Sokka dragged Zuko on a hike over the ice flats so that they could get to the highest peak by the village, to watch the lights. 

The hike was preplanned, and Sokka had confessed to Katara that he planned to propose when the lights were brightest in the sky. Zuko had heard from Kanna about how breathtaking the lights were, so he told Aang about his own plan to propose when they were at their most visible. Katara and Aang convened in the middle, and encouraged Sokka and Zuko onto their plans, hoping that their timing would match up.

They did.

When Sokka and Zuko came back to the village, Sokka with a silver headpiece carefully pinned onto a topknot that Zuko had hastily made out of his wolftail, and Zuko with a betrothal necklace sitting around the base of his throat, both of them had tears on their cheeks and smiles on their faces. Aang and Katara had been waiting awake in the igloo that the four of them were sharing, and when Sokka and Zuko stepped through the door flap and into the main room, Sokka glared at Katara and Zuko glared at Aang, but all four of them met in the middle in one giant hug, crying and laughing and deliriously joyful.

Later that night, when Sokka and Zuko were laying together in bed, Zuko turned towards his boyfriend-  _ fiance,  _ Sokka was his  _ fiance-  _ and sighed, rubbing his hand up and down Sokka’s cheek.

“You know that we’re going to have to come clean, right?” he whispered, moving his hand to play with Sokka’s hair. 

Sokka nodded, a grim little smile taking over his face. “At least the council will stop pressuring you about getting an arranged marriage.”

Zuko gulped. “And if they don’t?”

“Then I’ll pull a Mai and threaten them with my sword,” Sokka said simply. “Don’t worry, baby,” he reassured. “We’ll be okay.”

Zuko blew out a breath and curled further into Sokka’s warmth. “Yeah,” he breathed, his words becoming vapor in the cool air. “We’ll be okay.”

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


Five days later, when Zuko and Sokka returned to the Fire Nation, they walked together into the first council meeting of the day, talking quietly amongst themselves. Zuko’s betrothal necklace sat proudly on his throat and Sokka’s headpiece shone in the occasional ray of sunlight. Zuko could practically  _ feel  _ General Zi and Admiral Fong’s eyes lingering on the betrothal necklace, but he took his place at the table as usual, Sokka sitting by his side. 

Ambassador Shira cleared her throat. Admiral Fong coughed. 

“Council,” Zuko started. “Before we begin discussing the autumn harvest, I have an announcement to make. During my stay at the South Pole, I became engaged to be married. Ambassador Sokka and I plan to wed before the next year’s autumn harvest.”

All at once the room erupted into noise. The two Ambassadors from the Northern Water Tribe sat looking scandalized, Admiral Fong and General Zi both started yelling, the Western and Southern Earth Kingdom Ambassadors stood from their chairs, the delegates from across the Fire Nation looked stunned, and Zuko could see the Northern Earth Kingdom Ambassador placing a few coins into Ambassador Shira’s hands, out of the corner of his eye.

“All of you, sit down,” Sokka said suddenly, standing from his chair. Everyone went silent, and all of the Earth Kingdom Ambassadors sat back in their seats, but General Zi and Admiral Fong remained standing, glaring daggers at Sokka. “General, Admiral, you too,” he spit sharply. The two men both sat down, glaring heavily at Sokka nonetheless. “Zuko’s relationship with me is  _ not  _ to be questioned. None of you should see  _ anything  _ wrong with the fact that the leader of this nation is allowing himself to marry the person that he loves, man or woman.”

“But Ambassador,” Admiral Fong spoke up. “The heirs-”

“Heirs will not be a problem, Admiral,” Sokka said cooly. “And in case you have forgotten, I am a master swordsman and will not hesitate to correct any misconceptions about the marriage between myself and my fiance. Keep that in mind, Admiral, General.”

The rest of the meeting went off without a hitch.

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


A little less than a year later, Sokka and Zuko were married two weeks before the start of the autumn harvest. They got married in the Fire Nation, during sunset when both Agni and Yue were in the sky. Katara and Suki stood by Sokka’s side, Toph and Aang by Zuko’s. Fire Sage Shyu presided over the ceremony, although Kanna presented the traditional Water Tribe blessings, using Yue’s name instead of Tui’s. (Sokka asked for this personally, and yeah, maybe he let a tear or two fall during the blessings, but Zuko carefully wiped them away, so it was all worth it in the end.)

The ceremony was held in the same courtyard as Zuko’s coronation, with the wedding party standing up on the raised platform and the guests in the courtyard below them, Fire Nation citizens packing in from all sides as well. After the public ceremony, the time came for the private reception. It was just as beautiful as the ceremony, if not more, because it was held in the palace gardens, and filled with their closest friends and family, and a part of Sokka felt like everything was coming together, because Jin and Azula were spinning together in the middle of the dance floor, and Aang and Katara were doing that waterbending dance of theirs, and he could see Bato and his dad out of the corner of his eye, leaning against one another. 

Beside him, Zuko, his  _ husband,  _ was gripping tightly to his hand and leaning his head onto Sokka’s shoulder. Across the dance floor from them, Mai and Toph were engaged in a particularly concerning conversation about killing someone by spearing their lungs out with their spine, and beside those two, Ty Lee and Suki were talking about the best places to visit the beach on Kyoshi Island. Kanna and Pakku were dancing as well, a traditional Water Tribe dance, Piandao and Jeong Jeong were canoodling at a table in the back, and Iroh and Bumi were conversing excitedly about the new breakthrough of the jewelry business in Omashu.

Everyone was there. 

Later that night, though, when it was just Sokka and Zuko, together, wrapped up in silky sheets and sticky with sweat and smiling so wide that it hurt, Sokka brushing the hair away from Zuko’s forehead while Zuko laid atop his chest, he knew that it would all turn out okay. Because they had each other.

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


It wasn’t until more than two years later, during the winter of Zuko’s twenty sixth year, when someone brought up the topic of children again.

This time, though, it was Zuko. 

It was late at night, late enough that everyone in the palace should’ve been fast asleep. But, in the Firelord’s chambers, Zuko was tossing and turning, unable to quiet his mind. Beside him, Sokka was at least  _ pretending  _ to be asleep but Zuko could tell by the depth of his breathing that he had yet to give into the weight of unconsciousness.

“Zuko, baby,” Sokka said finally, flipping over to face Zuko and grabbing his hands. “What is it?”

Zuko shook his head, inching himself closer to his husband. He nestled his head carefully into Sokka’s shoulder, and blinked, once, twice. “I don’t- I can’t-”

“It’s okay, sweetheart,” Sokka whispered, raising his hand to brush gently through the long strands of Zuko’s hair. “What are you thinking about?”

“Kids,” Zuko breathed, after a moment of silence.

“Any kids in particular?” Sokka asked, taking his free arm and wrapping it around Zuko’s waist. 

“Our kids.”

“Oh,” Sokka breathed. “I see.” he paused for a moment, taking a deep breath. “Why’re you thinking about that now, sunshine?”

Zuko sighed. “I dunno. I guess- it’s just- I dunno. It’s just kinda on my mind, because I’m worried that the council is gonna get on my ass again soon about heirs, and I know that the Firelord’s children have to have a biological relationship with them, and there’s all that stuff that they’re coming up with in the North, with egg donation and whatnot, but, ugh, I dunno. I just feel really conflicted about everything.”

Sokka hummed and moved the hand that was carding through Zuko’s hair to cup the back of his head, holding him to his chest. “Okay. I get it. It’s complicated. But it’s you, it’s your body, and you can do whatever you want with it, okay? If you want to see if we can try out some of the Northern procedures, then so be it. If you want to do something else entirely, that’s fine too.”

“I don’t think I’m ready yet,” Zuko whispered into the skin of Sokka’s neck. “But I don’t- when I  _ am  _ ready, I think I want to have a baby. I want our baby to be  _ our  _ baby, Sokka, not the baby of me and some doner or something. You deserve to be a dad just as much as I do.”

Sokka breathed in deeply and tugged Zuko even closer to him, nuzzling into his hair. “I love you so much, you know that right?”

Zuko wrapped his arms around Sokka’s shoulders and sighed happily, nodding. “Yeah. I love you too.”

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


Six months later, this time in the council room again, the topic of heirs was brought up once more. 

“Lord Zuko, Ambassador Sokka,” Ambassador Shira started, “it has been nearly three years since your beautiful wedding, and I am sure that you’ve had very important things to work on in that time, but the nobles are getting restless. Without heirs, the Fire Nation’s future is unstable, and people are afraid that if either of you died without an heir the Ozai loyalists may take that as an opportunity for an uprising.”

Zuko inhaled slowly, his hand shaking almost imperceptibly at his side. (No one noticed it other than Sokka, who had made himself perfectly attuned to all of Zuko’s little imperfections and saw the small tremble almost immediately.) As much as Zuko was afraid of the idea of children, Shira was right. The main flaw in their security plan, their contingency plan, was the lack of an heir.

“Ambassador Shira, you’re certainly right about that,” Zuko said, trying to sound as sure of himself as possible. “Ambassador Sokka and I have a plan for heirs, and we will have a more in-depth conversation between the two of us as soon as possible. For now, though, we should return to this meeting to the topic at hand.”

Shira nodded. “Of course, Lord Zuko.”

The rest of the meeting passed as usual, but afterwards, Sokka and Zuko sat alone in the council room, both of them with a cup of tea in their hands. They moved from the big, circular table in the center of the room, instead sitting at a small, low table in the corner, near the big floor-to-ceiling windows. Sokka took a sip of his tea, and smiled, a grim little thing, reaching across the table to place his hand atop Zuko’s.

“It’s okay to be afraid,” he said softly. “We’ll be okay.”

Zuko nodded slightly, and looked up at Sokka, his amber eyes shining. “We should start trying.” He took a deep breath. “For a baby, I mean.”

Sokka’s eyes widened, but he nodded at Zuko nonetheless, squeezing his hand. “Okay. But only if you want to. You shouldn’t have to feel pressured into anything just because the council says you have to do it. We can always look into some of the Northern medicine stuff.”

Zuko was insistent though. “No. It’s okay. I’ve been thinking about it for a while, you know that. I’ll be okay. I think so, at least.”

“Okay,” Sokka whispered, leaning across the table to press a gentle kiss onto Zuko’s scar. “Okay.”

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


The first time they tried, Zuko was so hopeful. He swore that they got all of the timing right, and Sokka was so kind, and so sweet, and so, so, gentle. But, two weeks later, Zuko came stone faced out of the bathroom and fell into Sokka’s arms, unable to cry and yet aching inside.

(It made no sense, he reasoned while Sokka rubbed his back, for him to miss something that he never even had.)

A month after their first try came the second. Zuko had a renewed hope, a spark in his eyes, and Sokka was just as gentle and kind and loving as he always was, and something about it just gave Zuko a  _ feeling.  _ And then again, another two weeks later,  _ nothing.  _

(Zuko did cry, that time. Sokka did too, just a little.)

The third try came another month later. Sokka practically had to coax Zuko into it that time, had to persuade him by saying that there was no reason to give up, no harm in trying once more. 

(If there really was any harm, it was the feeling of emptiness that followed Zuko around for days after another failed attempt.)

Four days after the third attempt saw Zuko in the training yards, practicing with his swords, a sheen of sweat sitting over his skin in the Fire Nation heat. He was trying his hardest to keep himself grounded through the ache in his muscles, the burn in his lungs, but his mind kept drifting back to earlier that week, another tally on a long list of failures.

_ “No,” Zuko whispered, coming out of the bathroom and falling into Sokka’s ready arms. He shoved his face firmly into Sokka’s shoulder, not able to look up because he didn’t want to see yet another variation of his husband’s disappointed face. “Another no.” _

_ “It’s okay, baby,” Sokka reassured him, “we’ll figure it out.” _

_ “Sokka is there something- is something  _ wrong  _ with me?” Zuko choked out, tears sliding the good side of his face.  _

_ “Zuko, no,” Sokka breathed, his arms tightening around Zuko’s waist. “Please, sunshine, don’t say that. There’s  _ nothing  _ wrong with you.” _

But there had to be something wrong, something messed up inside. There was already so much that was messed up about Zuko, his childhood, his trauma, his  _ scars,  _ it made sense to him that he wouldn’t be able to carry a baby either. Why should the universe give him anything else? He didn’t deserve it.

“Sparky?” a familiar voice broke through his thoughts. Vaguely, Zuko registered that he was keeling on the stone floor of the training grounds, his arms wrapped around his midsection. There were tears streaming down his face, but he couldn’t remember when he started crying. Then, a pair of small arms wrapped around him, and someone kneeled in front of him, holding his shaking form close to them. “Sparky, you gotta breathe,” Toph whispered, her bangs tickling Zuko’s face.

Haltingly, Zuko hauled in a lungful of air. He let it out, and then took in another. Toph removed her arms from around his shoulders and took his hands in her smaller, callused ones, rubbing her thumbs over his wrists. When Zuko had calmed down enough to breath regularly, he opened his eyes and looked at Toph, who was staring blankly at his neck, her eyebrows furrowed.

“Hey, Sparky,” she murmured, sensing his more relaxed breathing. “You doin’ okay there?”

Zuko chuckled humorlessly and stared down at their joint hands. “No,” he whispered. “No, I’m not.”

“Zuko,” Toph breathed, in a rare divergence from her constantly joking tone. She’d grown tremendously in the years since the war, and became one of Zuko’s best friends, and by the time he was twenty seven and she was twenty two, her visits to the palace became almost monthly.  _ I must’ve forgotten that she was coming today,  _ Zuko thought to himself. “Hey, what’s wrong. What happened?”

Zuko sniffled lightly, considering. He and Sokka hadn’t told anyone that they were trying, simply because they didn’t want another person to disappoint. But, Zuko figured that if he was going to tell anyone, it’d be Toph.

“Sokka and I are trying for a baby,” he whispered after a moment. When Toph raised her eyebrows at him, silently prompting for more, Zuko sighed, tightening his fingers in her’s. “This is the third time that it hasn’t stuck.”

“Oh,” she murmured. “Zuko, I-”

_ “Please,  _ don’t apologize,” he interrupted her. “You have nothing to be sorry for. It’s probably my fault anyways.”

“Zuko, no,” Toph said, suddenly fierce. She used her grip on his hands to pull him up, and then squared her feet, twisting her hands so that he was pulled into the earth up to his knees, in order to be eye level with her. “Don’t ever blame yourself. I know you, okay? You’re one of the strongest people I know. And sometimes, stuff like this takes time. You just need to wait until the universe decides that you’re ready. I promise you. It’ll stick.”

Zuko breathed in once, and then pushed the air out. He breathed in again. “Thank you, Toph.”

He exhaled, and found part of himself cautiously believing her.

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


Two weeks after the fourth try, Zuko came out of the bathroom with a carefully guarded look on his face. Sokka glanced up at him from where he was sitting on the bed, his hands twisting together nervously.

“So?” he asked, standing to meet Zuko in the middle. “Anything?”

“I’m late,” Zuko murmured under his breath, eyes wide in disbelief. “I’m late,” he said again, looking up at Sokka with a tiny little smile on his face.

Sokka’s mouth split into a grin. “So?” he asked again, this time much more excitedly. “What does that mean?”

Zuko’s smile slipped a bit, and his brows knitted together. “Well, it could just be a bit off schedule and  _ actually  _ just a few days late. Or…”

“Or?” Sokka prompted, reaching down and grabbing Zuko’s hands in his own.

“Or I could be pregnant,” Zuko finished, hands shaking in Sokka’s grip. “But I don’t- we shouldn’t get our hopes up too much. I don’t want to be disappointed again.”

Sokka was still grinning, and he leaned down to haul Zuko into a kiss, smiling against his mouth. Zuko sighed into it, releasing Sokka’s hands and wrapping his arms around his husband’s neck.  _ No getting our hopes up,  _ he reminded himself.  _ I can’t disappoint him again. _

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


A week later, Sokka woke up to find Zuko hunched over the toilet, his forehead resting against the cool porcelain, chest heaving with heavy breaths. Immediately, Sokka knelt down beside him, pulling his hair away from his face and rubbing a heavy hand up and down his back.

“Sunshine?” Sokka murmured. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” Zuko breathed, lifting his head so that he could flush the toilet and flip the lid down, before laying his head and arms over it, closing his eyes against the pounding in his head. “Yeah, I just woke up this morning and I didn’t feel great.”

Sokka’s eyebrows shot up into his hairline. “Baby…” he whispered. “You don’t think…?”

Zuko squeezed his eyes shut, his hands playing with the hems of his sleeves. “I don’t know. I mean, I completely missed my cycle, and now this,” he paused, sucking in a breath and sitting up slightly so that he could rest his head against Sokka’s shoulder. “I just don’t want to get all excited about it and then be disappointed again. I don’t think I could take that.”

Sokka sighed. “I know. I get it.”

  
  


~~~~~~

  
  


The next month, Zuko was late again. 

When he came out of the bathroom that day, more than five months after the first try, he couldn’t help but smile.

“I think this might be it,” he whispered to Sokka. His husband giggled, and then his giggles spread to Zuko, and then they were both laughing and jumping, and crying, maybe just a little. 

After a few minutes of celebrating, Sokka kissed Zuko gently on the cheek and then kneeled down so that he was eye level with Zuko’s stomach. He gingerly lifted Zuko’s sleep shirt to expose his midriff, looking in awe at the still-unchanged plane of skin.

“Hello in there,” Sokka whispered reverently. “It’s me, one of your dads! We love you so much already, little one, and we can’t wait to meet you.” Carefully, he leaned forward and pressed the softest of kisses to the space right below Zuko’s lightning scar. “Be nice to your other dad, okay? Don’t be too hard on him, he’s got a lot on his plate already.”

Above him, Zuko chuckled, bringing a hand down to rest just above where Sokka’s face was. He leaned his face down and his long hair nearly brushed his bare stomach, but Zuko just smiled and pushed it out of the way. “Hi, baby. It’s me, your other dad. Please, do be nice. This is gonna be tough for all of us.”

Zuko watched as Sokka pressed another kiss to his stomach, this time to the right of his belly button, and then stood, pulling him into a soft kiss. “I love you so much,” Sokka whispered, tucking a piece of Zuko’s hair behind his ear. “Agni, you’re amazing.”

Zuko breathed out a laugh, and stepped gently away from Sokka, stretching his arms above his head. “I think I’ll go and see Anya, just to make sure.” he said quietly, looking at himself sideways in the faraway bathroom mirror. 

(Later that day, Anya, the palace healer, would confirm that Zuko was pregnant, promise to keep it a secret, and give him some tea to help with the morning sickness. Later that day, Zuko would give her a raise.)

“Okay,” Sokka murmured, coming up behind Zuko and wrapping his arms around his waist. “We should start getting ready. Morning council meeting today, remember?”

Zuko groaned, tipping his head back onto Sokka’s shoulder. “Ugh, General Zi is always such a  _ bitch  _ in the mornings. Do I  _ have  _ to go?”

“Yes, baby,” Sokka chuckled, “you’re the Firelord, I think you have to go.”

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


Zuko had a rough first trimester. 

By the time he visited Anya, he was already six weeks along, and halfway through the first trimester. To Zuko’s chagrin, his morning sickness persisted, but Sokka was always there to pull his hair away from his face and rub his back and build him up afterwards so that he could get ready to go to his meetings.

(Even as Zuko’s stomach began to round out, just slightly, they didn’t tell anyone. He was still early enough into his pregnancy that it was almost invisible to someone that didn’t know him well enough, but Sokka could see the way that his normally chiseled torso was rounding out slightly, the way that his chest was beginning to swell.)

By the time Zuko hit his eleventh week, the morning sickness had calmed down slightly, occuring only a few times a week, but that was when the cravings kicked in. They were mostly for the most specific types of tea, like a particular brand of cheap ginseng that Zuko had as an Earth Kingdom refugee, or the type of jasmine that only Iroh could perfect, but Zuko found that a simple cup of green tea with a spoonful of honey could level out the worst of the cravings. 

During his twelfth week, Katara, Aang, Toph, Suki, Mai, and Ty Lee all came to the Fire Nation in order to celebrate Bumi’s first birthday. 

The Fire Nation was a good central point for all of them, mostly because there was an almost equal distance between the Fire Nation and the Earth Kingdom, the Fire Nation and Kyoshi Island, and the Fire Nation and the Southern Water Tribe. (It was also convenient because Zuko was the only one who was really  _ tied  _ to his nation, and Sokka was tied to Zuko, so they didn’t leave much, other than for their four yearly visits to the South Pole and any diplomatic trips.)

The day that everyone was set to arrive, Mai and Ty Lee got there first, with Suki a mere thirty minutes behind them.

“Sorry,” she panted, sliding into the small sitting room that the others were already congregated in, “I accidentally agreed to help with docking the boat and got held up at port. How are you guys?”

Mai snorted at her and sighed, throwing an arm around Ty Lee’s shoulder and leaning back against the couch that they were sitting on. “Pretty good,” she said boredly, “I mean, you saw us thirty minutes ago, and nothing much has happened since then.”

Suki huffed out a laugh and collapsed into an armchair that was next to the loveseat that Sokka and Zuko were sharing. “Oh, shut up. I was talking to Sokka and Zuko, if you must know.”

“Well we’re very good as well, thank you very much,” Sokka put in from where he was practically wrapped around Zuko, a hand resting  on top of his lightning scar. 

“Who’s good?” someone’s voice sounded from the doorway. Sokka looked up to see Aang and Katara walking into the room, Katara with a squirming Bumi in her arms.

“We are!” Sokka exclaimed, jumping up to take Bumi from Katara so that she could rest. “It’s good to see you, buddy!”

Across the room, Zuko scooted over to make room for Katara beside him, letting her lean against his side. “Hey,” he said softly. “How’re you doing?”

“Good,” Katara huffed, leaning her head back against the couch. “I mean, tired, but still good.”

“That’s good,” Zuko hummed. “How’s parenthood treating you?”

Katara chuckled under her breath. “Well, I haven’t slept more than five hours in a row in the past year, and my baby likes to chew on my hair, but other than that I love him to bits, so it’s not so bad.” She looked away from Zuko, glancing at Sokka, who was holding Bumi in his arms, swaying back and forth slightly while he kept up his conversation with Aang. “What about you two? Any plans for a future Firelord?”

Zuko swallowed and glanced down quickly at his stomach, looking up just as fast. “Um, yeah. Yeah, we have some arrangements in place.”

Just then, Toph sauntered into the room. She paused in the doorway, smirking. “Wassup, bitches?” she greeted the room, shifting her foot around to sense the various heartbeats throughout. Suddenly, her stance shifted. Her left foot moved more inwards, and her brows furrowed slightly. Then, her face lit up in a grin.

“Hah!” she exclaimed. “I knew you could do it! I told you Sparky, didn’t I!” Zuko’s eyes widened, but before he could fully comprehend her words, he found himself with an armful of Toph, who was grinning widely. “What’d I say, Sparky? You just gotta believe! I knew it!”

“Wait, hold on,” Sokka said suddenly. “It’s- can you- is there a heartbeat? Already? I didn’t think- I thought it was too early for that.”

“No,” Toph said, “there’s definitely a heartbeat. Here- let me-” she cut herself off by pulling a small chunk of rock from the ground, and letting it move in time with the tiny, quick heartbeat that was emanating from inside of Zuko.

“Oh, Agni,” Zuko whispered, bringing a hand down to cup the small bulge of his stomach. “Oh, wow.”

“Wait, hold on,” Mai said from the other side of the room, “Zuko, are you…?”

Zuko nodded tightly, biting his lip and trying to keep the happy tears from spilling over. “I was twelve weeks this morning.”

  
“Oh, you guys!” Ty Lee exclaimed, shooting up from the couch and launching herself at Zuko. Across the room from them, Katara had shot up from the couch and had Sokka wrapped in a hug, Aang piling on top of them, and Suki and Toph were jumping around together, yelling happily at the top of their lungs. 

Almost silently, Mai glided across the room and draped herself over Zuko’s shoulders, smiling quietly into his collarbone. “Congratulations, Zuko. You’ll be a great dad.”

He sniffled quietly, turning his face to inhale the familiar scent of her hair. “Thank’s, Mai,” he choked out. “That means a lot. More than you could know.”

  
  


~~~~~~~   
  


Iroh came to the palace right around when Zuko hit the four month mark. He had finally reached the point in his pregnancy where his stomach stopped rounding out and started growing. It still wasn’t at all noticeable underneath his heavy formal robes, but when he and Sokka were alone in his chambers and Zuko was wearing only his underclothes, the small bump was visible.

They found out that he was having a girl. Sokka was overjoyed at the idea of a daughter, and Zuko loved the thought of the next Firelord being a woman, but their daughter’s gender made giving her a name that much harder.

Early in the pregnancy, Zuko and Sokka had agreed on the name Iroh for a boy. Their list of girl names, however, was… longer.

“Kiara?” Sokka offered one morning over tea. He was sitting with Zuko, in the small sitting room that was attached to their quarters, both of them with a cup of herbal tea in their hands. 

“Hm?” Zuko hummed, looking up from the scroll that he was reading and towards his husband.

“Kiara. As a name, I mean. For the baby,” Sokka explained. “I dunno, I just think it’s kinda pretty.”

Zuko sighed, leaning back onto his hands. He’d found that as his bump grew, the strain that it put on his back did as well, and he was always having to adjust his position so as not to be in pain. “I’m not sure,” he murmured. “I mean, sure, it’s a fine name, but I just don’t think it  _ fits,  _ y’know?”

Sokka huffed in defeat. “Yeah,” he sighed.

“Lord Zuko, Prince Sokka?” came a voice from the doorway. They looked up to see Amira, one of the maids from the kitchen, leaning into the room. “General Iroh is here to see you.”

“Oh,” Zuko said, “I didn’t know he was in town.” He glanced down at his bump, eyes wide. Turning to Sokka, he said, “We haven’t told him yet.”

Sokka nodded. “You can send him here, Amira,” he called. She nodded and closed the door behind herself, flouncing off down the hallway. Across the table from him, Zuko was breathing in and out deeply, hands resting underneath his bump. “Hey,” Sokka whispered, “it’ll be okay. It’s not like he’s gonna be upset, right? There’s nothing to be worried about.”

“Yeah,” Zuko breathed, “I guess you’re right.” He took in another deep breath, and huffed out an exhale. “Can you- can you come and sit next to me?” he asked quietly, not looking up at Sokka.

“Of course I’ll sit next to you, sunshine,” Sokka said softly, standing from his place across from Zuko and sitting down next to him. He sat on Zuko’s left side, and let Zuko lean into his right, wrapping an arm around his waist and bringing his hand down to rest on the underside of Zuko’s small bump.

A few moments later, Iroh bustled in through the door, his traveling bag swinging at his hip. “Lord Zuko, Prince Sokka, how wonderful it is to see you!” he greeted, sitting down peacefully in the seat that Sokka had just vacated and pouring himself a cup of tea. “Ah, you’re having some herbal today, I see. A very nice choice, Nephew.” Iroh turned around and started digging into his bag, obviously searching for something. “And how have you two been?” he asked, still turned away from them.

“Ah, pretty good, all in all,” Sokka answered, wrapping his arm tighter around Zuko’s waist. “We had a week or so with our friends last month, and that was really nice, Bumi’s already a year old, how crazy is that?”

“Oh, yes, the way that time passes is quite peculiar,” Iroh sighed, before straightening up with a victorious grin. He had a small pouch in his hand, and he slid it across the table to Zuko, patting his nephew’s hand. “It’s honeysuckle tea,” Iroh explained when Zuko raised an eyebrow at him. “It always helped your mother with her morning sickness, so I figured it might help with yours.”

Zuko’s eyes widened, and he reached out for the pouch of tea, grasping it with shaking hands. “Thank you, Uncle,” he whispered. Sokka gave his waist a squeeze. 

Iroh smiled at them. “Anything for you, Nephew.”

“You know,” Sokka said suddenly, “I think we could actually use your help with something else.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, we’ve been trying to figure out a name for a while now, and we just can’t settle on one,” Sokka explained, smiling happily when Zuko leaned over to rest his head on Sokka’s shoulder. 

“It’s a girl,” Zuko added after a moment, when Iroh’s brows had knit up with an unasked question. 

“Oh, that’s lovely,” Iroh murmured. “Izumi, I think, would be a name fit for your princess. It means ‘glacier’ in the ancient tongue of the Fire Nation, a very fitting name for a daughter of the two of you, I think.”

Zuko sighed in satisfaction. “Izumi,” he whispered, the name slipping from his mouth like a breeze. “I love it, Uncle.”

“Me too,” Sokka said gently, reaching out his free hand to rest on top of Zuko’s stomach. “Izumi,” he said, “a perfect name for a perfect girl.”

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


Later that night, Sokka came into the bedroom to find Zuko already laying in bed, on his right side, with his head twisted to look up at the mural on the ceiling. 

“Hey, baby,” Sokka called out softly, closing the door behind himself as he walked further into the room. He reached the closet and began to take off the top layers of his robes, and once he was in only his underwear he put a loose pair of sleeping pants on top of them. 

“Hi,” Zuko said from the bed, flipping over so that he was laying on his back. 

Sokka quickly went into the bathroom to brush his teeth and wash his face, and he came back out with his hair hanging freely at his shoulders. He crossed the room and kneeled down on the bed beside Zuko, pressing a kiss onto his forehead before getting up again, and sitting down at the small writing table they had in the corner.

“What’re you writing?” Zuko asked sleepily, turning from his back onto his left side so that he could face Sokka. 

“A letter to my dad,” Sokka replied, reaching for ink and a brush. He pulled a sheet of paper from the shelf beneath the desk and started to write.

_ Dad, _

_ I’m sorry I haven’t written in a while; things are busy over here. I wanted to tell you that Zuko and I won’t be able to visit next month, but we might be able to make the summer visit if the timing works out. If not, you may just have to come up here. _

_ I’m not sure if Katara has already told you this (I asked her not to, of course, but you know how she can be), but if she hasn’t I figured that you’d probably rather hear it from me than anyone else. So, here goes nothing: _

_ Zuko’s pregnant.  _

_ It feels weird to write that out. I think it’s the first time I’ve done so, actually, because we were so afraid that things wouldn’t work out, for so, so long. You see, the thing is that Zuko and I were trying for a few months before we got a try that stuck, and even then we weren’t sure if we could trust the pregnancy to stick, to not be a fluke. _

_ But it wasn’t. Zuko’s four months along now, and that also feels weird to write out, but I’m doing so anyways. We’re having a daughter. Her name is Izumi, it means glacier in the ancient Fire Nation script. Iroh helped us come up with it earlier today. I can already tell that Firelord Izumi will be a wonderful ruler, can’t you? _

_ We’d love it if you and Bato, or maybe even Gran Gran could make it up here to visit us. We miss you all dearly, but Anya has told us not to travel too much while Zuko is carrying, so we won’t be able to make it down there for the solstice. _

_ I’ll miss it, of course, but can you even imagine that just a year from now, I’ll have a daughter that I can bring to the festivals with me? A daughter, Dad, a human being that I helped to create. (Zuko’s doing all of the hard work, though, his first trimester was really rough and he still has little bouts of morning sickness now and then, but really his big hindrance recently has been the back pain that comes with carrying a baby in your body and having a complete shift in your center of gravity. It’s tough, but so is he.) _

_ I already love her so much, and I’m sure you will too. You’re welcome here anytime you want. _

_ Love, _

_ Sokka _

“Okay,” Sokka said, “all done.” He held out an arm for Hawky, who came swooping into the room from his previous perch on the balcony, and tied the letter to the hawk’s leg. “This is for Dad in the South Pole, okay buddy?” Sokka told him, giving Hawky a congratulatory pat on the head when he ‘nodded’ in affirmation. The hawk flew out of the still open window, and Sokka got up from the desk, moving to slip into bed beside his husband.

Zuko was still laying on his left side, but he rolled to his right when Sokka climbed into bed, letting him wrap his arms around his waist, spooning him from behind. 

“Love you,” Zuko mumbled tiredly, relaxing into Sokka’s hold.

“Love you too,” Sokka whispered, keeping his face smushed into the pillow so that he could get his lips as close to Zuko’s covered good ear as possible.

Sokka curled his hand around Zuko’s bump, letting it rest there for a moment. “Love you, too, baby girl.”

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


The first time that Zuko felt the baby kick was the most inconveniently beautiful moment. 

He was about to pass the five month mark, and his bump was still small enough that the council didn’t notice anything. He was standing from his chair in the council room, closing out a regular, simple meeting, when he felt it.

Just a little flutter, in his lower abdomen. He brushed it off at first, continuing through his recap of the meeting, but then it came back, more secure this time. 

A little kick, right beneath his ribs.

Zuko paused in his talking for a moment, eyes wide, but then coughed quickly and tried to brush past the moment. “And, uh, and the Southern Island’s request for more financial aid is to be handled by Ambassadors Shira and Jai. That’s all that was covered today, this meeting is now dismissed.”

The council members all stood and bowed, and Zuko bowed back, before everyone began to filter out of the door. Once the last General had left, letting the door swing closed behind himself and leaving only Sokka and Zuko in the council room, Zuko exhaled deeply, looking down at his concealed bump.

“You alright, sunshine?” Sokka asked, coming up behind him and placing his arms around Zuko’s shoulders.

Zuko nodded on a shaky exhale, and then smiled, tipping his head back to rest on Sokka’s shoulder. “Mhm,” he hummed. “She kicked.”

Sokka huffed out an incredulous laugh over his shoulder, muffling the noise in the fabric of Zuko’s robe. “Oh, Tui and La. Really?”

Zuko nodded. He reached up and grabbed Sokka’s hand, bringing it to rest upon the same spot that Izumi was kicking away at. “Yeah. Here, do you feel that? That’s her in there.”

“Oh, wow,” Sokka whispered. “Agni, you’re amazing. Have I told you yet just how amazing you are? Because you’re so amazing.”

Zuko chuckled quietly. “It’s okay. You don’t have to say it. I already know.”

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


When Zuko was six and a half months along, he and Sokka went to visit Azula. 

She had moved to a small villa on Ember Island after her therapists considered her safe enough to be released from the facility that they’d had her in after the war, and she and Zuko kept up a friendly correspondence, although they didn’t see each other in person all that much.

And, to everyone’s surprise, Azula became a midwife. 

Well, to everyone but Zuko. He had to admit that once she was rid of all of the anger, and the malice, and the violence and the hate, Azula was a very motivating person. If she wanted something, she would stop at nothing to get it, whether or not that something was to conquer Ba Sing Se, or to deliver a baby. She was wonderful at motivational speeches, and was hailed by many mothers (or fathers, men like Zuko) throughout the Fire Nation.

So, Azula moved to Ember Island, and while she was there, met a kind, caring, and sweet Earth Kingdom girl, who wore her hair in two braids down her back and kissed her brother in Ba Sing Se.

(To say that Zuko was surprised when he visited Azula to meet her girlfriend and saw Jin standing in the kitchen was an understatement.)

“Zuko, Sokka!” Jin exclaimed as she opened the door, gesturing for the two men to come inside. “It’s been too long! Azula’s in her study, I’ll go get some tea started and bring her in here.”

Zuko and Sokka walked further into the house and sat down in the little sitting room that was next to Jin and Azula’s kitchen, Zuko curling into Sokka’s side. It was raining on Ember Island, and the wet ends of his long hair kept tickling the back of his neck, sending chills up and down his spine.

“Zuzu,” Azula said serenely as she walked into the room, settling down across the table from Zuko and Sokka. Jin came in from the kitchen a few moments later, a tray laden with tea cups and a teapot in her hands. She sat down next to Azula and poured them each a cup, the comforting smell of jasmine wafting upwards in swirls of smoke. “What brings you two all the way out here?”

Zuko took a deep breath. Underneath the table, his hand searched for Sokka’s. “I’m pregnant.”

Azula’s eyes went wide.

“Oh,” she breathed. “Is that- are you- how far along are you? Who knows? Have you made any public announcements yet? Do you-”

“Azula,” Jin cut her off, “give him a second to breathe.”

Zuko smiled gratefully at her. “I’m six and a half months along,” he started, “we’re having a girl. Her name is Izumi. Uh, our friends know, Uncle and Sokka’s family back at the pole know, and Anya knows, but other than that it’s just you two. We haven’t made any public announcements yet, and I don’t think we’re going to.”

“Zuzu,” Azula whispered, leaning across the table to grab Zuko’s free hand. “Congratulations, you idiot. You’ll be great dads.”

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


When Zuko hit the eight month mark, Anya sent him back to Ember Island. She said that the responsibilities of the Firelord would be too much for him in the last month of his pregnancy, and he didn’t put up too much of a fight.

(It was for the best, really. Zuko was getting to the point where his bump could maybe show underneath his heavy, formal robes, and he did  _ not  _ need to deal with the council and being eight months pregnant at the same time.)

So, he and Sokka headed for the Ember Island Estate, while Iroh took up Zuko’s duties for a few months. Zuko’s absence was put under the guise of ‘a retreat for his mental health’, and no one questioned it after Iroh sent icy glares towards the few people that dared to do so.

When they moved to Ember Island, part of Zuko was relieved, because it meant that he no longer had to hide his state from anyone. It was just him, Sokka, and a few servants there at the estate, but their friends came to visit frequently, Azula and Jin the most frequent of all. 

But another part of him was… scared to shit.

There were some days where the fear would become all consuming, and Zuko could bear to drag himself out of bed, days when nothing could soothe his mind other than Sokka’s callused hands on his back and Sokka’s low voice in his ear, reassuring. Those days were always the worst, but every once in a while, Izumi would kick, or flip over, and Zuko would be reminded of why he was doing it in the first place.

To have his daughter. To have a  _ child,  _ flesh and blood, that he and his husband created. 

And Zuko knew, he  _ knew  _ that it would be hard to get there. He knew that there would be days when he wondered why he was even doing it in the first place. But there was always a reminder from his daughter, or from his husband, that told him exactly why.

So Zuko pushed through.

He did it for his family.

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


Zuko was thirty eight weeks and five days pregnant- just a mere two weeks and two days from his due date- when he went into labor.

It was a quiet day on Ember Island; Aang, Katara, Mai, Ty Lee, Suki, Toph, Azula, and Jin were all visiting, Toph coming with Aang and Katara from a political summit in Ba Sing Se, Suki, Mai, and Ty Lee all visiting from Kyoshi Island, and Jin and Azula swinging by from just a few streets away. Bumi was there too, nearly eighteen months old at that point, and sitting happily in Katara’s lap. They were all seated together around a small table on the back porch, drinking tea and trading stories.

It was halfway through Suki’s story of Avatar Kyoshi’s girlfriend (with helpful insights from Aang at times), when Zuko felt the first contraction. It almost went unnoticed, actually, and Zuko almost brushed it off as another false contraction. (He’d been having a lot of those, lately, little aches in his lower back that went away after a few minutes. Azula and Katara explained them as his body’s way of preparing itself for labor.)

The contraction started off as just a small wave of pain in his lower back, but the pressure steadily moved upwards, settling right below his ribs. It lasted for about a minute, and Zuko took deep breaths so as not to make a noise of discomfort, trying his best not to distract from the conversation.

Toph, of course, could not be fooled.

“You alright, Sparky?” she asked, elbowing him gently in the side as the pain tapered off into a barely noticeable ache. 

“Yeah,” Zuko breathed. “I’m fine.”

Toph still looked sceptical, but she let it go for the time being, to Zuko’s great relief. The chatter around the table went on as normal, and when Suki and Aang’s joint tale was finished, Aang brightened up with a mischievous smile.

“Hey, I know another story of a previous Avatar!” he exclaimed, turning to Zuko and smiling widely. “Whaddya say, Sifu Hotman?”

Zuko groaned, tipping his head onto Sokka’s shoulder. “Agni, please, no, Aang.”

“Ooh, I wanna hear this,” Toph said happily, leaning back against her arms with a sly smirk on her face.

“La, give me mercy,” Zuko moaned, his words slightly muffled against Sokka’s neck.

“So, do you guys want to hear about how I’m actually Zuko’s great-grandfather?” Aang teased. Zuko groaned again.

As  _ that  _ conversation went on around him, Zuko was mentally timing the time between the first contraction and the second, if there was going to be one. He knew that timing them was important, although he’d never bothered to ask why.

Ten minutes later, almost to the exact second, another contraction hit.

The second was much like the first, an ache that started in Zuko’s lower back and spread up his abdomen, stopping once it reached the bottom of his ribs. This contraction persisted for about the same length that the first one did, but once it faded the ache that remained was stronger, more potent.

But it was fine, Zuko told himself, it was probably only false contractions again. He still had more than two weeks until his due date, surely it wasn’t actual labor.

The third contraction came ten minutes after the second.

The fourth came nine and a half minutes after the third, give or take.

By the time the fifth arrived, nine minutes and seventeen seconds after the fourth, the pain had gotten to a point where Zuko couldn’t hold back the little whimper that escaped his throat, instead turning his face to muffle it in the fabric where his head was still resting on Sokka’s shoulder.

“Zuko?” Sokka asked in concern, turning his head to see his husband as best as he could. “Sunshine, are you alright?”

Zuko nodded once, tightly, in return, his eyes squinted shut. 

“Hey, talk to us,” Sokka persuaded, lifting a hand to run through Zuko’s hair, which was hanging loose around his shoulders. 

The contraction eased off enough that Zuko could breathe easily enough again, but he left his head resting on Sokka’s shoulder, eyes still closed. “Just- uh, just a contraction.”

Sokka’s eyes went wide. “C-contraction? Like, you’re having a contraction?”

“Was having one,” Zuko muttered, wincing as the lingering ache got worse. “It’s fine though. It’s not that bad. It’s probably just another false one.”

“Zuzu, how many have you had?” Azula asked from across the table, setting down her teacup. 

“And how far apart are they?” Katara put in. 

“Oh, Agni,” Azula muttered, “please tell me you’ve been timing them.”

Zuko huffed out a laugh from where he was still pressing his face into Sokka’s tunic. “Yes, Azula, I’ve been timing them. That was the fifth one, and they’re like, uh, nine-ish minutes apart now?”

Azula and Katara huffed out simultaneous breathes. “Okay,” Azula whispered. “Okay, so that means-”

“You’re still in the early stages of labor,” Katara said, “which means that there’s still plenty of time between contractions, and things are gonna move quite slowly for a while, probably until your water breaks.”

“I could’ve told him that,” Azula snapped. “I’m his midwife, after all.”

Katara’s eyes narrowed. “No,” she said,  _ “I’m  _ his midwife.”

“You two can both be my midwives, how about that?” Zuko interjected, cutting off the conversation before it could get any more heated than it already was. “Can we- can we just keep talking? I don’t really want to focus on it until I have to.”

There were murmurs of agreement from around the table, and Aang sprung back into the story of Sozin and Roku. Zuko kept his head tucked into Sokka’s neck, counting the minutes in his head.

Eight minutes and thirty seconds after the fifth contraction came the sixth. Eight minutes and seven seconds after that one came the seventh. Seven minutes and fifty five seconds after the seventh came the eighth. Seven minutes and forty two seconds after the eighth came the ninth. 

By the seventeenth contraction, they were starting to come five minutes apart, and consistently.

Zuko’s breath hitched as another contraction rolled in, and he turned his face more fully into Sokka’s neck, letting his husband rub a hand up and down his back. Sokka was whispering in his ear, comforting words, if his tone was anything to go by, but Zuko couldn’t focus on anything past the pressure that was building against his lower spine, and the rumble of his husband’s words past his ear.

A minute after it started, the contraction eased off into a dull pain, and Zuko exhaled deeply, sagging against Sokka. 

“There you go,” Sokka whispered. “Just breathe, darling. Just breathe.”

“That one was worse,” Zuko wheezed out. “It was the longest, too.”

Katara and Azula both hummed. “They’re getting closer together, and longer, which means that your labor is progressing faster,” Katara explained.

“The baby is dropping lower, so there might be some more pressure on your lower back, too,” Azula added.

Zuko nodded slowly. “Okay,” he breathed. 

The rest of their friends were still sitting around the table, their cups of tea long since abandoned, looking at Zuko with concern.

“Z,” Suki sighed, “are you- is there anything we can do for you?’

“Yeah,” Ty Lee said, “we want to help!”

“Anything for you, Sifu Hotman!” Aang exclaimed.

Despite it all, Zuko smiled. “Thanks, guys,” he whispered, leaning fully against Sokka’s side. Beside him, Toph grabbed his free hand in her own, squeezing it ridiculously tight.

“We love ya, Sparky,” she murmured. “And, you too, Snoozles,” she added, leaning over Zuko to look in Sokka’s general direction.   
  


“Thanks, Toph,” he sighed, reaching over Zuko with the arm that wasn’t being clung to to pat Toph on the head.

“Zuko,” Mai started, her voice taking a detour from it’s usual monotone diction, “thank you so, so much for having your own children. There’s no way in hell I’d’ve enjoyed doing it for you.”

Zuko gave a breathless chuckle. “I don’t think anyone would enjoy this,” he muttered, “but you’re welcome nonetheless.”

They all laughed at that, and some of the tension faded from the table. Bumi gave a little gurgle, and reached for Zuko with flapping hands.

“Koko!” he exclaimed, squirming away from Ty Lee, who had him on her lap.

“Do you wanna hold him?” she asked, raising her eyebrows at Zuko.

“Yeah, sure,” he said, finally easing himself away from Sokka. He held his hands out, and she passed Bumi to him. He balanced the baby on top of his bump, smiling down at his unruly head of chestnut hair. “Hey, buddy,” Zuko whispered. “What do you think about getting a new cousin, huh?”

Bumi babbled happily, clapping his hands.

“I think that means he’s excited!” Aang exclaimed.

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


“C’mon, Zuko, just a few more pushes!”

The pain was excruciating. The burning, the aching, the feeling of muscles pulled taught. It was unforgiving and unrelenting.

Zuko sobbed helplessly, throwing his head back against Sokka’s shoulder. His husband was sitting behind him on the bed, and Zuko had both of his hands in a vice grip, shaking. Beside him on his left was Azula, carefully stroking hairs away from his forehead, on his right was Mai, wiping his face with a small washcloth. At his feet was Katara, helping to guide Izumi into the world.

“I can’t,” Zuko sobbed, “please, I can’t do it. Please, please,  _ please,”  _ he cried, unsure of what he was pleading for but still pleading nonetheless.

“Hey, don’t say that,” Sokka whispered into his ear. “You’re so strong, Zuko, you can do this. You’re so close to being finished, it’s almost over, I promise.”

“No, Sokka, I can’t,” he whimpered. “I’ll be a horrible dad, and then she’ll hate me, and I- I can’t-”

“Zuko, don’t say that,” Sokka pleaded. “Please, you’re so much better than him. I promise you, I wouldn’t have married you or wanted to have kids with you if you weren’t. You’re so good, baby, so strong. You can do this.”

“Alright Zuko, here’s another contraction, I need you to take a deep breath and then push when your body tells you to, okay?” Katara instructed.

Zuko shook his head fervently, crying out when another wave of pain rolled through his body. Vaguely, he could hear Sokka’s encouraging words in his ear, Katara’s instructions at his feet, could feel Mai wiping her cloth across his forehead while Azula tucked a hair behind his ear, but it was all lost upon him, drowned out by insurmountable pain.

Somewhere, very, very far away, Katara exclaimed, “She’s crowning, Zuko, you’re doing so good!”

Suddenly, the burning sensation dulled out for a moment, just as the contraction tapered off.

“You’ve got her head out Zuko, you’re doing such a good job!” Katara said, “There’s another contraction coming, and I need you to take a deep breath and then push really hard so that we can get her shoulders out, okay?”

“Sunshine, you’ve gotta breathe,” Sokka whispered, squeezing Zuko’s hand tightly. Haltingly, Zuko exhaled the breath that he’d been holding, and hauled in another. “There you go,” Sokka praised, “just keep breathing.”

Another contraction had Zuko’s body tensing up, much too soon for his liking. He groaned and thrashed against Sokka, pushing as hard as he could.

“You’ve got one shoulder out, Zuko,” Katara murmured from her place at his feet. “C’mon, once you get the second shoulder out, you’ll be almost there.”

The contraction didn’t let up, and Zuko sobbed softly through it, leaning most of his weight onto his husband behind him. It burned, and it stung, like nothing that he’d ever felt before, and all he wanted was for it to be  _ over. _

“You have her second shoulder out!” Katara exclaimed. “Just one more push, and then she’ll be here!”

“Did you hear that?” Sokka breathed, incredulous. “Just one more push and we’ll have our daughter. You can do this, Zuko, I promise you. We’re so close.”

“I’m scared, Sokka,” Zuko whispered. “I’m scared.”

“It’s okay,” Sokka promised. “It’s okay to be scared. You don’t have to be afraid, Zuko. It’s gonna be alright.”

“Just one more push, Zuko,” Mai said softly from his side. “Just one more.”

“You can do it, Zuzu,” Azula encouraged. “We all know you can.”

Zuko sucked in a breath, and pushed. Suddenly, there was a rush of fluid between his legs, a cry in the air, and a squirming body placed atop his chest. He let go of Sokka’s hands and brought his arms up to cradle the baby, tears streaming down his cheeks, a delirious smile on his face. Sokka brought his arms fully around Zuko to help support their daughter, and he let his husband lean back against him, drained.

Somewhere far, far away, Mai was pushing on his abdomen to help deliver the afterbirth, and Azula was cutting the cord as Katara cleaned him up with an orb of glowing water, but all that Zuko could seem to focus on was Sokka’s arms around him and their daughter squirming around on his bare chest. She was crying, but even her cries were a beautiful sound, like music to Zuko’s ears.

“Hi there, Izumi,” he whispered, voice choked with tears. “Oh, Agni, Sokka, she’s beautiful.”

And she was. Izumi had inherited Zuko’s pale complexion and almond shaped eyes, however she had Sokka’s cerulean hues and chestnut hair. When Zuko started speaking, she immediately quieted down, and looked up at her dads with great curiosity.

“Yeah, she is,” Sokka agreed. Katara, Azula, and Mai quietly left the room, all of them leaving with a kiss to Zuko’s forehead and a quiet word of praise. Then, it was just Sokka, Zuko, and Izumi.

“You did so good, Zuko,” Sokka praised. “You’re amazing. You’re so amazing.” When Izumi let out a little noise of complaint, Sokka chuckled and tightened his grip on Zuko’s arms. “You’re amazing too, baby girl. I love you so much.”

They sat in silence for a few minutes, Sokka quietly cooing over his husband and daughter while Zuko took a moment to breathe. Suddenly, Izumi’s face scrunched up, and she started crying, little beads of tears slipping down her round cheeks.

“She’s probably hungry,” Zuko whispered. Katara had helped him pull a blanket up to his waist when she was finished healing him, but other than that he was naked, so Sokka helped him guide Izumi towards his chest. It took her a moment to realise what was in front of her, but when she did she started eating soon enough, big blue eyes looking up at Zuko in contentment.

“Tui, you’re incredible,” Sokka murmured. “I mean- you just- Spirits, I love you so much. You know that, right?”

Zuko hummed in agreement, but didn’t respond otherwise. Moments later, there was a knock on the door.

“Can we come in now?” Toph’s voice asked from the other side. “Sugar Queen told us to give you space, but it’s been like a half an hour and I think that’s spacey enough. I wanna meet the kid!”

“Yeah, me too!” Ty Lee exclaimed.

“Ditto!” Aang added.

“I want to meet her too!” Suki said.

“You can come in,” Zuko sighed. The door opened quickly, and everyone filed in, smiling widely.

“She’s got a good heart, Sparky,” Toph said quietly, coming to stand beside the bed. “You did good.”

“Thanks, Toph,” Zuko whispered.

“She’s beautiful, you guys,” Suki murmured.

“Ooh, her eyes, Zuko! They’re so pretty!” Ty Lee exclaimed.

“She’ll be an amazing Firelord,” Aang said. “I look forward to working with her.”

“She’s perfect,” Mai whispered.

“Absolutely perfect,” Katara affirmed.

“My favorite niece,” Azula breathed.

“Mine too,” Jin smiled.

“Thanks, guys,” Zuko whispered, his voice getting choked with tears once more. “Agni, you’re gonna make me cry again.”

“Can Bumi meet his new cousin?” Aang asked suddenly. Zuko looked over to where Bumi was squirming about in his father’s arms, trying to reach the new person in the room.

“Yeah, sure, Aang can you just put him on my lap?” Zuko said, lifting Izumi up higher to make room for Bumi. Aang leaned over and placed Bumi on Zuko’s lap, and Sokka lifted one hand from Zuko’s to support Bumi, keeping him upright.

“Izumi, this is Bumi,” Zuko said softly, “he’s your cousin. You two are gonna be best friends, yeah?”

Both babies gurgled happily, so Zuko took that as a yes.

  
  


~~~~~~~

  
  


Later that night, Zuko and Sokka lay in bed, Izumi in a bassinet beside them. Zuko was laying on his left side, and Sokka was spooning him from behind, mindful of the tenderness of his abdomen.

“You’re amazing,” Sokka whispered, for what could have been the tenth time that day. “I mean, Tui and La, Zuko, you’re so incredible”

“Thanks,” Zuko breathed. “I couldn’t have done it without you, you know. I’d be nowhere without you, darling.”

“And I’d be nowhere without you,” Sokka murmured, pressing a gentle kiss to the base of Zuko’s neck. “I love you, Zuko.”

“I love you too, Sokka,” Zuko said softly. “If Izumi’s hungry and I’m still asleep, wake me up, okay?”

“Okay,” Sokka whispered. “Get some sleep, love, you deserve it.”

“G’night.”

“Good night, my dear. Sweet dreams.”

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Hey there! I hope yall enjoyed this! Just a little shout out, this is a gift to James (@xhangmehighx), who was really helpful in answering some of my questions about having a trans identity. You da man, James! If yall enjoyed this, please drop a comment and kudos, they always make my day!
> 
> xx,  
> CJ


End file.
